‘Hippo's Revenge’ (2025)

Set in a safari rescue center, ‘Hippo's Revenge’ follows father and establishment owner Crispin (Jason Bailey) and his daughter Sora (Jenna N. Wilson). Together with staff Aluna (Evyn George), Daniel (Tom Marchant) and Tish (Tish Piwowarek) the group prepare to welcome two new additions to their park, - a baby and mother hippo. Before their arrival however, the sub-Saharan animals have a turbulent journey to the rescue center.

Providing a comprehensive vibe check on the hippos as they are transported to the UK, the animals are mistreated en route to the drop-off for Crispin. With one of the wranglers harassing the baby hippo as it had allegedly bitten him, the film blows its load and reveals the mama hippo within the first 3 minutes of the feature’s runtime.

Unveiling the ‘big bad’ almost immediately at the start of the film may not necessarily be a bad thing, however ‘Hippo’s Revenge’ instantly betrays itself and displays its budget and CGI prowess immediately, uncovering that the film is made on a shoestring budget and that we shouldn’t hold our breath for any big and impressive graphic animation going forward.

Again, not necessarily an absolute mood killer, the film makes one reminisce of other low budget B-movies that have had a way of finding their place in people’s hearts and forming a strong cult following specifically because they are bad movies that are fun to watch.

Unlike ‘The Room’ (2003) or ‘Sharknado’ (2013) however, ‘Hippo’s Revenge’ is so bad it’s unwatchable. Outside of the budgetary restrictions and graphic shortcomings, the film suffers in every other conceivable manner as well. With a plot that meanders and has a few holes to acting that can only be described as exasperating, the movie has little to offer to anyone.

Serving zero chemistry and a below 1-dimensional character portrayal, the cast try to work with what they’re given but the stilted dialogue and clunky exposition make one wish for the hippo to escape already just so we don’t have to keep following the non-existent character development for much longer.

Most frustratingly, the title more than alludes to an angry beast roaming and hunting down unsuspecting civilians. Particularly because of the fast-paced opening, one would assume that there’s a lot more in store where that came from. Conversely, viewers are subjected to what feels like an eternity of nothing much happening. Even with an 82-minute runtime, the feature drags and crawls to the finish line.

Subpar action, poor plot and most damningly – precious little of the poorly animated beast compounds to an unpalatable and monotonous affair. Admittedly, concluding on an awkward and very much anticipated death speaks volumes to the quality of the film on the whole. Remarkable only in its capacity to continuously demand the viewers to expect less as the film drags on, ‘Hippo’s Revenge’ should not form part of anyone’s watch list.

Score: 0/4